Sunday, May 31, 2009

The Hangover...



So my husband and I got to see this movie last night sneak preview thingy...and HOLY SHIT it's fucking hilarious from start to finish, so go see it bitches...
LUV JESS

aahhhhhh i cant wait !!!! JULY 15th!!


ya im a Harry Potter nerd fuck you for laughing :p
<3jess

WE FINALY got a trampoline!!!!

fun times on the tramp....


Even Nixon and Mervin like it.. kind of... Mervin kept getting under me while i was bouncing so he got a couple of head bashes...


Collin, Matt and Jeff behind Coll all on skateboards get the tricks down..kinda
they also strapped on Collins old ass snowboard (it's a 121) and played on that...



uh i dunno whats going on here... just fun times....



Matt's getting mad air....
luv Jess

Friday, May 29, 2009

this movie is amazing!




So I totally watched this movie on the Sundance channel (weird channel) But I FINALY got to see this movie.... I love Zombie movies (btw) ! And its great, it's set in the 50's and we won the zombie war and then enslaved them! It's super cheesy and really worth watching, so do it! 
<3 Jess

Monday, May 25, 2009

I love cartoons!!!

AAHHH I miss good cartoons, I really like Sponge Bob (even though my husband says it makes me stupid?) but lets get some good shit back!!!

She Ra Princess of  fucking Power, He Mans cousin or lover? ... I had all of these action figures..they were so pretty! And they kicked boy toy ass! Girls need strong characters again not these fuckin puss ass bitches, you know like Dora and Ki-Lyn  



AAAHHHH Rainbow Brite  I loved her when i was super young, I also had these stuffed figures too!!! I was Rainbow Brite for Halloween when i was 8 my mom made it for me so it was fucking rockin! , so rad. I want to live in a rainbow land with a horse and fun friends always in there work out clothes!


Truly outrageous   Jem was a mild mannered lady by day, but a rockin BITCH at night!!!! Her main competition was the Misfits also fucking awesome!   It's show time Synergy!
The Misfits just look rough, like dudes that will fight you in there dresses....


love Jess!!!

Your tampons showing...


Um doesn't she pay people to tell her this is going on? Watch carefully around the 15-16 second mark
watch the crotch....like you weren't already..
at least she's not pregnant again!!!! luv jess

Cage taps out on Daisys love...

Ahh a new week for a man to dump Daisy,  The day starts with Cage, Sinister, Fox and a napping Chi chi in the top bunk, there all pissed about how daisy got soooo upset about London leaving and how they feel that there not as important as London was to her... Cage gets loud Chi chi says in his douche scared boy voice "hey keep it down "  several times and then cage begins to bang the bunk bed  against the wall and Chi chi asks Cage for his bandana  back... cause he's gay...whilest all this is happening cool truck driver guy Big Rig (hhhooonk hhhooonk) decides to bring Daisy breakfast in bed umm coffee and fig newtons (don't get it fucked up fig newtons are delish... but as a fucking breakfast food?) so Dasiys comment on Big Rig bringing he b-fast (this is what i have been fucking hinting at all along ) "Finaly someone besides Ricky cares about me" I guess he's the only one putting his dick in though.
 So SUPER RAD CHALLENGE TIME>>>>>>>> ok Daisy is having them create her album cover for her single (that no one will buy) 2 teams.. team 1 Chi chi, Big Rig, 12 Pack and Cage. Douche bag team 2, Flex, Sinister, Fox and Six pack...They have to decide on hair, clothes location, and make up and have a person shoot pics.. so team one does a so called "Marylyn Monroe" look but i guess there dumb cause she totally looked like a flapper,, and her and 12 Pack were making out the whole time EEEWWWW, Big Rig having sharecd the romantic b-fast gets upset and walks out on the challenge... Team 2 does a "punk rock" shoot i guess Fox is a hair dresser and tells the pro dresser to get the fuck out and does her hair and make up GAY, Flex is the model for the shoot but Fox decides to jump in and be in it too.. GAY
After all the bull shit team 2 wins, Fox gets a solo date acts stupid and can't talk and Cage get DRUNK and start fighting with everyone, But he's a fighter, you cant hold him down,, 
Then the funniest thing that will ever happen on this show happens  a skunk gets in the house.. ahh i can't find video  of it cause VH1 is a monster but theres alot of skunk spraying and naked underwear gayness and 12 Pack pouring salsa all over himself Oh god when i find it ill post it.. N E WAYS move onto just before elimination's and Cage says 
"Later bitch im angry" Daisy cries, for the first time(?) perhapse Ricky is confused and no one else leaves I leave you with a picture of the champ Cage

the end love Jess

Friday, May 22, 2009

omg this looks like a young Jeff

I really hope this is NOT my husband in high shcool.....AAGGGGGGHHHHHH


Monday, May 18, 2009

smokin Obama style

Um could he look any more stereotypical than he does in this picture?
I feel racist just looking at it! He just need a bucket of KFC and a glass of purple drink for when the munchies kick in.. or his favorite these days " a regular cheeseburger no mayo no ketchup, but some um dijon mustard if you got that layin around" sorry thats totaly came from some news clip trying to relate Obama to just regular guys.. maybe they should have used this pic. So since he smoked pot and we have that on record wheres the demon George Bush do'in coke lines? If I find them you'll be first to know, Bush was stupid but not stupid enough to take pictures of illegal activities...



LOVE JESS

daisy of love dropout..... go back to moms house

"What's the point of a boy toy if you can't toy with them?" Daisy 5-17-09 
Words of wisdom 


So yet another man decided to leave Daisy of Love on his own accord, only after winning the challenge which was way so amazing (not), it must have come directly from Daisys amazing brain!  OK they were giving 3 team captains who got to choose there band (whoa rockers cool). OK teams went a so,,, Sinister, 12 pack and fox... 6 gauge, flex and big rig, finale team London, cage and Chi chi.  Chi chi not being picked by sinister greatly hurt his manginas feelings... so any ways they had to make nursery rhymes into rock songs OMFG Daisy is soooo was smart and inventive long shitty story of songs short London's team wins, they get to go on a way cool amazing date with Daisy to the Gibson guitar factory place thingy... and gives them all a free guitar then London begins to cry and say that he had to sell his guitar for drugs or moose or some thing and she feels so much better about herself that she drops this pearl of wisdom  " A musician with out a guitar is like a blonde with out her bleach" 
Wow so on the date London opens up to her she ignores him, Chi chi sits like a dumb ass then Cage gets alone time talks about his mom passing whilst on a joy ride in her car?  So she forgets all that London says and he get ass hurt in the limo, then at they house all the guys and her play truth or dare. She asks London the same question that he already talked to her about and he gets sad walks away. daisy chases they make out and then she says "im gona offer you a chain you can decide or not to take it" BLAH BLAH BLAH  Ricky of corse says he wants her to send London home... i guess she called out London when they were fucking the previous night... all in all London denies the chain Daisy runs away crying 
end
luv Jess

Friday, May 15, 2009

Is this your family?

Please please please review this web page and hope to GOD or what ever false deity you worship that your family is not here...Review these samples....





Check the rest out Here
luv Jess 

I went on a trip....

So last March and this May I got the wonderful opportunity to visit Europe, these are just 4 of the pictures of my travels...

This is the inside of the colosseum the floor is being renovated so this ground area was under the floor where gladiators and animals were kept....

So mostly obvious this is the Eiffel tower, I did not go up the lines were way to long both times.... I pretty sure Paris was my favorite place. i have been twice and highly recommend going if you can.  


snow in the German Alps YYAAAEEEEEHHHHH, ya i'm wearing jeans i look gay. I really wanted to snowboard but it would have been a huge pain in the ass to drag my snowboard and gear across the world... and there was noway I was going to pay to ride the Burton crap rentals they had YUCK!

Ok so if you go to the Leaning Tower of Pisa you have to try to push it back up.... Florence Italy which is just a 1/2 train ride to Pisa had the best food by far amazing shrimp with there heads still on :( 

All in all on both trips I visited London, Paris, Dublin, Rome, Venice, Pompeii, Pisa, Florence (Tuscany wine region) Germany, and drove through part of  Austria, So all in all I saw like 10% of Europe. I can't wait to go back .. I hope someone else I know gets to move there so I can visit....

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

you might like this video...you guys

Nuf Said.... but i guess i can bitch about it...

ya im a republican    ya fuck this guy  and if your mad, if you think i'm wrong then maybe you should leave America it's my right to hate a persons who LIED and SUCKS at his job... Every motherfucker wore "not my president" shirts and HATED on Bush and that was just okely dokely, (don't think that i think Bush was some kind of amazing President he had his faults) so why can't I hate on Obama? Cause he' s 1/2 black? OOOHHH NOOOOO i guess i'm a racist? well not most of the time ;)   but I defiantly don't want to be a socialist at any time....
LUV JESS
Saturday Night Live - Motherlover



this needs no words to describe how funny it is.....

<3 Dani

Monday, May 11, 2009

Daisy is BOOOOOOO

AHHH Sorry my weekly daisy dissin is late last-night I got super wrapped up in the newest evil plot to have sluts take over the world the fabulous Charm School show....holy cow! that is a show on a totaly different slut level! Any ways these are our champs from this weeks show....
So she made them compete in a "keep daisy safe" paintball challenge. They had to carry a mannequin covered in tattoos and wearing ewww so slutty cloths safe from the EVIL Heather (from ROL) paintballer men, most of the guys dropped her and Chi Chi even used the mannequin as a shield hahahahah, the black team won which means they got to body paint on  daisy wooooowwwwzeerrs cool then um Sinester got a private date at the club where dumb assed Daisy forgot him! lameo
OK first but last to leave , the grossest male striper that ever existed Toolbox. He really couldn't answer if he was there for Daisy,,, so she said later and went in to her room and "cried" Ricky Ratchman of corse came to her defense " i don't want to ever see miss daisy upset, she takes this very seriously" OMG SHUT THE FUCK UP WE ALL KNOW YOU FUCK HER!!!


This charmer below is Cable Guy i know he sounds promising, free skin-a-max anyone??... Daisy said that he was to nice and "calm" for her so is that code for ummm, your black and you've been here 3 episodes so byeee? did he really think he was going to win?


This is Brooklyn last episode his "ex" girlfriend called about a 1,000 times, he told Daisy after he completed the challenge that his heart just wasn't in it and he was somewhere else.. so more guys have cut themselves from this show than she has cut... thats why she is BOOOOOOO               <3 style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 267px; height: 400px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_3mJO1N4bDqI/SgpboxDGJ4I/AAAAAAAAAKc/kUvsasY0Pik/s400/brooklyn.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5335177464492992386">

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

New Quentin Taratino movie




So this is a rad looking movie... for some reason i thought it was a little more on the comedy side? I dunno why? I guess because Quentin's' movies are always kinda a dark comedy, but i guess it could be? It's also a remake of a movie from the 70s'. are any movies original these days? Oh beware super weirdo Eli Roth is in the movie he's a kreepster! So anyways it's also like the first movie my husband has actually been excited to see.. at a movie theater! If you new my husband you know thats crazy :) So hopefully well be seeing this when it comes out in August. OOHHH i also hope this is the movie that REALLY breaks up Brad and Angela cause she sucks and they have been on and off supposedly... he should leave her and her exotic country baby stealn ass! <3 Jess

Monday, May 4, 2009

chappelle as lil john WHAT????

Chappelle's Show
A Moment in the life of Lil Jon - Oprah
comedycentral.com
Charlie Murphy VideosBuy Chappelle's Show DVDsBlack Comedy

OKKAAYYYYY

OMG CHAPEELLE IS THE BEST!!!!

Chappelle's Show
Pixie Stereotypes - In-Flight Meal
comedycentral.com
Charlie Murphy VideosBuy Chappelle's Show DVDsBlack Comedy
So this one is for  my hubby!!!! <3 Jess

Weekly Daisy update!!

Ok here are the CHAMPS that daisy kicked off this week... These fine gentlemen battle viciously for Daisy's love in a GRUELING show and tell type challenge !!! OMFG they had to show and fucking obviously  tell how and why their reasons for being on the show for Daisy... Most were lame except for the guy that gave her the vibrator!!! Hahahaha and then she acted like she was offended! The major losers of this challenge were giving the last chance challenge to win to get to go on the date with the challenge winners by giving some "grandmas" a lap dance eewww gross, London won the lap dance challenge and got to go on the surfing date. All the guys wore full body suits Daisy ummm cause she's so way hot wore a bikini lame...so check out the guys below the lose...or win....
Ok so this is "Professor" he's a college graduate that for some reason had a interest in Daisy... She dumped him because he had no personality.  So mostly that means he's not a douche bag. 


AAAHHH be blessed by the amazing WEASEL feel the glory of his blond main and the power of his alcoholism... He was kicked off for partying too much for Daisy! she stated he liked to drink to much..i guess there either to boring or too crazy for Daisy! He also said BONER KILL on the first episode  thats awesome.

Last but defiantly not least is the amazing back flipping tweaker Flipper, this fine lad decided to remove himself from the show after breaking a wine glass on his face, cause he's a tweaker. I guess he could only go soooo long with out his meth... 
   And yet again Rick showed his undying obsession with Daisy by making the decisions and talking for her...and longing for his dick to be in her mouth (again).... <3 jess

True Blood season 2 Preview!!!!! JUNE 14th!!